Being British, we feels it’s perfectly alright to lie, as long as we think it will make the person feel better (an exaggeration maybe, but something that’s part of our culture). “How do I look?”, “You’ve never looked better!” [Really?] We have a terrible habit of avoiding anything that might offend people, because we have a deep down desire to be liked and accepted by everyone. This has always been amusing to me (and something that I constantly battle with myself), but here in Uganda we don’t have the same problem.
Now walk with me so a few minutes through this made up shopping scenario. Your off to buy a new pair of jeans, and despite the fact that we do most of our shopping ourselves these days, without assistance, you decide to ask the salesman wether he has any jeans in size 36 (for example). He looks at you and being polite and British says, “Surely not sir, you look more like a 34! Come right this way and we shall sort you out!” Now at this point, both you and him know you’re a 36, but you feel good about yourself because someone has said you look thinner than you are, and he feels good about himself because he’s complemented you. Rightly or wrongly so, this how much of our culture thinks.
Now walk with me again rough my shopping experience, except now we are here in Uganda, where the sun shines most days, rather than just a few every year. And you walk up to the salesman, in need of some jeans, because your preaching at the youth Sunday, and they all decided the dress code would be jeans (because that’s what young people wear). Sadly, when packing you said to yourself, “it’s hot in Uganda, why would anyone want to wear jeans?”, so you didn’t bring any.
So your at the shop, it’s Sunday morning, because you left buying jeans to the last minute, and you tell him your after some jeans in size 32? (It’s a questions because your unsure what size system they are using here, thankfully it’s British). The salesman looks you up and down, and then says “Are you sure sir? You look more like a 33/34?” Yes, I said, knowing my size very well now, since I’ve been wearing them for many years. “But are you sure sir, maybe you put a bit of extra weight on since you arrived?” Now at this point in our previous example, both the shop keeper and I were floating on our clouds of ignorance, off to pick up the right pair of jeans. In this example, I’m trying not the laugh, but also trying to convince the salesman that I know better than him.
After looking at a few pairs in the colour I liked, and rejecting the most trendy ones he was highly recommending to me, I choose a nice 32 and proceeded to try and make the purchase. Sadly not. “They will be too small sir, you don’t want those ones, here try theses ones” (holds both pairs together) “Look! These are much bigger! They will be perfect!” I conceded. Maybe he know something I didn’t know, or maybe he was right and the carb rich diet had added an extra inch to my waste line. I found a “bigger pair” in the style I liked, and in the size the shop keeper was happy would fit, and paid the bill. These ones turned out to be cheaper than the previous pair I’d tried to buy, so I wasn’t too disappointed (no up selling here like you get in your local Burger King). And although it did little to repair my shattered ego, the label in these had the size ‘32’ written on it.
Ironically, when I put them on, they were too big. But they served their purpose well, and didn’t fall down during my preaching
